Friday, June 11, 2010

It is really great when you discover new tv shows, and you all know how much of a whore I am about my television. I discovered Friday Night Lights and had totally shaken it off as another stupid teen drama involving Football=boring since I don't follow sports. However, I took a leap and since I have all four seasons at my fingertips, began watching. What I love about Friday Night Lights is that the characters are very complex and add that to a group of talented and almost nameless actors you get a great show. Sometimes I think big names can overshadow a lot of films and we just see the same person over and over in the same type of films. So, when you get a show that has new, young, and untainted actors you have something more believable and enticing. The whole thing about football is central, of course, but it also represents a part of America and this thing that holds people together as one. I've always been surprised by the support people give to their sports teams and having been on one myself I understand the bond and what it takes to build a great team. I guess, when you're a small town in America, you have nothing more to than that and for most of these guys on the team, this is their ticket to a better life and into fame and excess. I didn't think that an American show could be compared to my favorite Brit series Skins, but FNL definitely does. Each episode gives a focus on a certain character and we learn the reasoning behind their behavior we have only lightly seen in previous episodes. Part of the reason people are able to connect is the gritty, documentary style filming with a lot of lingering shots showing characters reactions and emotions in a more natural way. What both Skins and FNL do is show a new generation of teens who are smart, fucked up, learning, and trying to grow up even when their parents are more immature and worse off than they are. It makes you feel like you are not alone when things have gone wrong in your life and people have their own issues you don't see outright until you figure out why friends/people act the way they do. So go check out Friday Night Lights AND Skins, I promise you, you will not be disappointed!

Wednesday, June 9, 2010

SO I'm not that Bitter

I just have to say, guys are douchebags (girls can be too). I've mentioned this person to my friends before and they know who I'm talking about mostly (no names!). But people in general can be frustrating and difficult, I know many of those people. I just don't like bull shit and I would rather just have people say what they really want to my face and tell me like it is rather than dance around the subject (or act too nice). Now I am not upset recently by anyone so everyone just quit questioning our last conversations and thinking I'm talking about you. This is just a general douchebaggery post I came up with out of some kind of thin air. Now I haven't had the best luck with guys so far as I've NEVER had any kind of stable relationship ever, and maybe it's my cynicism and negativity towards longterm relationships that stops me from ever pursuing anyone further. But...have you ever met that one person you just can't get over? I have and it's quite annoying especially when you become crazy about it and I wouldn't say stalkerish, but just desperate to make a re-connection. BUT I do have to say I had already made a connection (if you know what I mean) with this person once and spectacular/fireworks ablaze, but apparently I misinterpreted this whole situation (which sucks balls). just went downhill from there and I definitely (and it's my fault) put myself in that situation where I should have known that's how it would be. That movie/book "He's Just Not That Into You" is probably something I should pick up. It's hard though when you just find someone that fits your categories and the slots line up and you know that that is what you want. But all my types just seem not to be into me, and ladies and gentlemen I do not settle for anything less. However, I'm sure, as cynical as I am, I will eventually find that person (supposedly). It sucks when you see this person randomly (and I mean RANDOM) and they seem to know everyone else you know. So... I gotta take a hint, but I hate taking those, because I want what I want and so instead of pining after someone I won't really ever get, I'm gonna just have to wait it out and let karma take me there.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Dreams: It's never quite as it seems

So I've finally moved into my new place and things are already much better and normal. I love living in a homely, suburbly neighborhood. The drama is over for now.

So I was driving home the other day and one of my all time favorite songs came on (no it's wasn't Miley's Party in the U.S.A.) and it just brings back this rush of memories and emotions from a long time ago. It's a good rush though, not bad. I know, super corny but you know what I'm talking about and don't EVEN lie. All of you have that song that reminds you of a certain part in your life that even if the song is stupid to other people, it means something to you. So Dreams by The Cranberries is basically my favorite song and I can play on repeat for awhile and not get tired of it. I know that the first time I heard this song was around 1995 when I was at the movie theaters and I don't remember the movie I was watching, but, one of the trailers attached was The Babysitters club....yes. I think I saw the movie, I don't remember, but that point in time when I heard it locked in this kind of happy feeling that whenever I hear the song everything just goes away and I think it's also one of those songs that is relevant to a lot of people. The opening lyrics basically sum up what's just going on in general with I think me, and a lot of my friends as we're going out into the "real" world. It is definitely not the easiest thing, but you can be anything you want, however you want. But Dreams just reminds me of the 90's, even though my parents were divorced and there was all that crap going on. At that moment when I first heard the song it just kind of takes me back to the simplicity of my younger life at age 7 or 8 when I heard it and ever since it always seems to come on at just the right times. Dreams are really never quite what they seem, but I guess they change and mine definitely have lately. Well there's my cheesy post for the day :)

"Oh my life is changing everyday
Every possible way
Though my dreams, it’s never quite as it seems
Never quite as it seems"

Tuesday, June 1, 2010

Karma's a BITCH

I am not religious whatsoever (war..hello but this is a whole nother topic for a whole nother day), but I'm not completely faithless. I have faith in myself and the GOOD people that I surround myself with. If I believe in's karma. I like to think we all have these invisible karma tokens and you build up a stash (or you suck and you don't) kind of like paying it forward in a way. I think I've stored a lot of them (and have used a lot too). BUT this is kind of my own little thing that I think keeps me a good person and I know how and when to cash these in.

So if you've been reading my blog you kind of know who my roommate is. Well it's gotten to the breaking point. Sober roommate=biggest asshole on the planet. A lot of you also know that I helped him basically get rid of the little 19 year old and get him into his first steps of recovery from alcohol AND listening to him get all emotional for hours on end. Right before this debacle I flat out quit my job and have been looking for something ever since and had had a lot of money saved. Well so through this whole time helping my roommate he told me over and over during these drunk crying sessions: "don't even worry about rent, you are a great friend, I have tons of money (half a million to be exact), no one else cares and you do." all this stuff right and I was like wow thanks that could really help me out right now (I never asked him to do this). So after not doing his rehab and not going to meetings and making excuses his mother finally takes him to the hospital for detox telling me that his mother would take care of the dog while he was gone (which was good since my new job started early so I wouldn't have to get up so extra early to walk her etc...) The next day he then proceeds to tell me to help him out with the dog and I ask him if his mother would take her (like he'd already told me) just so I wouldn't have this huge inconvenience (After dealing with all of his already). He gets upset that "I won't even help him" blah blah blah. Mostly because I didn't believe he would go, I then say fine and try to figure out if one of my friends can walk the dog. The next day, the dog is gone with his mother as he tells me and I roll my eyes in annoyance. Well he went for like 3 days and he should have stayed for a month long program but he's worried about work which he doesn't really need to be (since it's a family business and he's loaded and they told him to take all the time he needs--because his mother told me this directly), he's just using it as an excuse again. He assures me he hasn't been drinking and is sober and is going to go to meetings (which I really don't believe) So after telling me about his detox I proceed to my room and as I leave he goes "So when are you going to pay me rent?" and I go oh well we talked about this like a hundred times and you said it was fine...I was completely taken aback like we had never had this conversation before. I really felt like I had earned my rent free month for dealing with the shit that I dealt with the whole time after he'd told me it was ok. He then proceeds to tell me he is annoyed that I use his detergent, paper towels, and that he can get someone to rent out the room for $1,000 (double what I pay), and that he feeds me (he invites me to eat dinner with him (like maybe 4 times out of the year I lived here) because he made so much food) I am standing there shocked, pissed, and hurt for investing my energy into helping him get better then to basically be told that he "can't have this in his life anymore" and basically said I was not welcome and that he needed my rent money (my measly $500 bucks). He is selfish, greedy, and unappreciative. It was a really big "fuck you Lorenzo". Well I'm done with that. I would rather hassle with moving and paying rent to someone who isn't an asshole and trust me, once you burn your bridge with never gets built again (I hold grudges like no other), I've already tried doing that too many times and people like my soon-to-be ex-roommate don't deserve that. So my karma tokens came into play right after that conversation...I've got a full work week and a new place to live with a normal person. Can't wait to see what karma will do next.

Monday, May 31, 2010

Do it While You're Young

I think I've already talked about this before but I LOVE my friends. I just had a crazy memorial day weekend that included many many different and wonderfully crazy things happening. I love being able to still have a good time despite not being in college and enjoying all my friends celebrations this weekend. I have come out of my shell a lot these past few months and I've been able to do so because of them. Sometimes I say a little too much of what I'm thinking, but most of the time it makes people laugh :) I have gotten so comfortable being myself lately that I feel like I can do just about anything and not worry about who is going to judge me because when you're with your friends it's like a big shield and I ignore those that might make those judgements, whereas before that's all I thought about. I mean I walked outside in public for a good chunk of time wearing my Lady Gaga costume which consisted of spandex pants, boots, and a plastic tarp with tape over my nipples. I walked down the street with the rest of my friends looking completely ridiculous, but not scared at all for what people might say. This gaga night ended with us going up to West Hollywood and really getting down dirty. Let's just say that I was taken home but this random guy who looked better at the club, I ran outta his place back to my friends and back into the club where I found my next victim...Well also to describe the rest of the evening. If you know the song Tik Tok by Ke$ha "I'm a fight til we see the sunlight" well we saw the sunlight as we got home at around 6am. It was a VERY interesting and random night which is what I love the most. I took Saturday off. HA. Sunday night began with another round of my favorite blue moons and waiting for the stupid taxi which never did arrive. I have already used and abused second street bars over the last couple years so I really detest them especially when there are lines. I don't wait in lines...But, luckily it was a sunday and not that many people were out. I was able to get people to stumble down to evo (formerly belmont station) because it has the only dance floor on the street and I wanted to get down. I got everyone there and we tore up the dance floor like we were in west hollywood. People stared, people gawked, some said things, but I didn't care because I was with my friends and they were being just as equally crazy with me. I loved it, we dominated and we all made love on that dance floor. Nothing can describe how I feel about these nights and I have so much fun doing random and crazy things like having bruises on my knees and smelling like my friend's perfume. After we got most people home, the remaining stragglers had to sober up so we sat outside on the street talking as loud as ever until we were finally yelled at by some angry neighbors. I will never forget these nights and I don't want them to stop for a very long time, until my dancing injures me somehow....

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

I'm a working MAN!

So today I started my first day at Honda Corporate as an on-call receptionist...yes a receptionist. When people hear receptionist they automatically think FEMALE! WOMAN! LADIES! Well yes I suppose that through our times we have stereotyped this position and what's even funnier is that I am probably the first male receptionist at this Honda center. I have the necessary experience having worked in entertainment internships and dealing with busy phone lines and my most recent position working for a crazy man as his personal assistant. So it is the talk of the town so far with everyone walking by my desk as I'm being trained thinking I'm the IT guy fixing the ladies' computers (even though I COULD probably do this). So my trainer today was tallying the amount of responses they got from me as shocked people figuring out I'm the new receptionist. I mean like shock in their how preposterous, and comical. I GUESS. I think it's a lot more common in the entertainment industry with men as receptionists' rather than a more corporate setting like Honda because I didn't think about it until my supervisor said she had to write up a dress code just for me and that it was this new revolution for them. I don't mind at all and I think there needs to be some manness in this place. The comments are funny, but they will get old fast as I am just as competent as any other female receptionist. I just happen to have a funny thing in between my legs. Times are changing for me (the gay thing) and I feel like I'm helping by breaking into Honda as a receptionist and giving people a new form of "receptionist" to look up to. Or...maybe I'm just really overanalyzing it....probably....

Monday, May 24, 2010

This is Why I watch Television

So the last few days I have been subjected to several season and series finales of some of my favorite shows. Most notably LOST which echoes an emotional response I had when ALIAS ended as well as the re-imagined Battlestar Galactica. Folks, I only watch quality television and I do argue with those people that don't "waste their time with TV" which I find to be preposterous. Of course there's tons of crap out there. But then there's stuff I like to compare to great novels that have a point and something where the viewer has a connection and the reason why I chose to study film and media in college.

I finally came to the conclusion that I enjoyed the LOST series finale even though at first I was just rolling my eyes. What I liked about the characters of lost is that they were all flawed, as all of us are, even when we try to hide those things. Everyone has messed up big time at least once in their lives. So, they are relatable and these characters have gone through shit storms and they've managed to cover up these secrets to the people they have met after they are stranded on this island. But, eventually they are found out as the inevitability of secrets do and there are so many consequences both positive and negative. I get so enamored with the characters in my favorite television shows because of how I can relate. It seems dumb, but even Alias gave me a glimpse into something that I felt I experienced in my own life. Sydney Bristow's mother supposedly dies in a car crash at a young age and is basically ignored by her father while growing up. Eventually she grows up to be a spy (that her father secretly trained her for while growing up (SO SHE WAS FORCED INTO THIS LIFE of ESPIONAGE)) and learns that her mother is actually alive (who is a "bad" spy) and is a crazy bizznatch who shoots at her daughter when seeing her for the first time in years. As the series goes on Sydney gets more shit piled up onto her than any other working woman I know, and sometimes, when there seems to be some kind of a mended semblance of a relationship with her parents (and half sister...long story) something goes wrong. But like most divorce situations, Sydney's parents were too concerned with their own ambitions (of protection and of finding eternal life (Another long story)) to really think about the child they had brought into this world who has to deal with the repercussions of her parents actions (which she never asked for in the first place). I think that what satisfied me most about the ending of the series was that her father eventually apoligized for everything, but her mother was still stuck on something "greater" than her daughter and Sydney never got that real closure she needed from her....Maybe I'm going crazy here because it's almost 2am. But, I think you catch my drift if you've been reading my posts here. I felt that kind annoyance and heartache that these characters have experienced loss and hopelessness, and I feel like it helps me cope in some ways. Even with Battlestar Galactica, it questions the notion of a "one true god" and my own confusion about "what's really out there" and LOST did the same thing with this whole light and dark, heaven and hell thing that doesn't necessarily have to do with a certain religion but just a question about what we have faith in.

I think I blabbed a lot and I think people that have watched all three of these series and know me would understand that's it's not me on crack or anything. But I love these kinds of series that represent ourselves for who we are as human beings both in the best of times and in the worst. If a show can make me get all teary-eyed and choked up like when I did with Alias, Lost, and Battlestar Galactica, then you have made a successful series.

So don't knock the boob tube just yet...give it a chance and I promise you that you can find something there for yourself, just like you could find in a book.